A job applicant looks worried, when a personnel manager says, "That's funny … All your employers I called are now out of business."
A CEO, sitting in an empty board room, thinks "It's lonely here at the top – thank God I've never been a people person!"
A CEO's secretary looks surprised when the CEO says, Cancel the meeting on our Five-Year Planning, Ms. Duncan," while handcuffed and being escorted by police.
A patient, laying in a hospital bed looks surprised and toys with his phone, while his doctor states, "Other than your choice of ring tone, I can't find anything wrong with you."
When a financial adviser asks his client, "Do you have your financial affairs in order?"
"Yes I do," his client proudly responds, "I have all my bills lined up on order of delinquency."
An investment broker, speaking with a client on the phone says, "‘Plummet' is such a harsh term, Mr. Dolan, we prefer to say priced ‘below cost basis.' "
At a board meeting, shareholders looks surprised when the CEO says "We won't survive unless we can charge as much for our new preventative drugs as it costs for a lifetime of taking our treatment drugs."